Out the Cyber Sex Offender
There is this extremely irritating trend that I keep seeing on some of the biggest social media platforms of blaming the victim when it comes to dealing with the cyber sex offender. We’ll just call the one I’m specifically referring to as ‘facefucks’, which I deem to be an apt name because I really feel like that’s what they are serving us.
Women are being targeted for aggressive sexual attacks by cyber sex offenders.
They are contacted, on a routine basis, by numerous people who have no agenda other than to engage in graphic sexual conversations and to send unrequested, unsolicited and extremely unwanted (not to mention unappealing) images of their male anatomy. Sometimes they are even so bold as to demand images from us. They are persistent. They are disrespectful. They are bullying assholes.
My particular policy is to try not to engage with these people at all, but sometimes I mistakenly think I am speaking to a fan who has messaged me about my writing (my mistake – will I never learn?). When I see what started as a friendly, professional conversation begin to plummet into aggressive, obsessive dick pic land, I firmly let the sexual offender know – without question, and beyond the shadow of any doubt – that I am utterly, wholly, completely uninterested in pursuing this path with him. 99 times out of 100 I am called derogatory names and my inbox in barraged with nasty images, I have no desire to look at, anyway.
That’s when the report/block buttons get used.
I have a long list of blocked accounts, though I have done nothing to encourage anyone communicating with me via my professional social media accounts to think that I would be interested in using said accounts in the capacity of an online ‘dating’ service. (Though anyone seeking to foster a personal relationship with me whose first thought is to message me with graphic anatomical images is sadly mistaken if they think that would endear them to me).
I am not alone.
I am not even in the minority. This problem is rampant and widespread. But facefucks seems not to give a flying facefuck about it. Instead, they wait for us to reach our limit and take measures into our own hands and they punish us for the actions we are forced to take.
When the oppressed become fed up with the merciless abuse perpetrated, relentlessly by multitudes of misogynistic, barbaric idiots and trolls – when we finally decide to rise up and shed some light on a problem of epidemic proportions, happening every day, to way too many undeserving people, we are punished for outing our cyber bullies.
When we post the unwanted pics of our cyber sex bullies (censored to preserve the modesty of the puritanical facefucks – who apparently don’t care what kind of immodesty goes on within their platform, in private, even when it is not consensual) to out them to the rest of our sisters, we have our accounts suspended for bullying.
Does anyone else see the irony there?
Instead of punishing us, they should be doing something useful like making a cyber sex offender registry and locking out the IP addresses of known offenders.
That’s right facefucks, blame the victim. Punish the victim. Good plan. Let the perpetrators walk away scot-free and unscathed by their vulgar and disgusting actions and set a good example for the rest of the social media community. You just let those trolls know that it’s okay for them to do whatever they want to us.. as long as it’s not out in the open. Let’s just give them a pat on the shoulder and a slap on the ass and tell them to keep up the good work.
Thank you, Kat!
You call it like it is. I have met some amazing people over the last year or so on social media, yourself included. But there is also a truly disturbing number of scary creeps here and it is an outrage that a multi billion dollar cooperation like the alluded to facefuck will choose to let the offenses slide and exclude the victims.
A registry is a great idea.
Absolutely agree. Sharing this.
Perfectly put Kat. I’m not sure what’s on Facefuck’s agenda by taking the position they have but it’s beginning to feel like another tool they’re using to drive indie authors off their site altogether. Especially in the face of today’s ban.
I would even go one step further – especially knowing the puritanical ‘family friendly’ ideals of the founder and his reticence to make a home on his site for grown up adult people above the age of consent or being told what to do… – and say that erotica authors are an unwanted commodity there, and that no one has our backs, or will stick up for us when we are harassed and/or abused